Pitch magnet

I have mentioned that I suffer from tinnitus. It manifests as white noise in the upper register and is always present but most of the time I can ignore it. It is not so annoying as to prevent me carrying on a normal life, except when my surroundings are quiet or when I want to listen to a quietly spoken voice or music. Additionally, but related, is the discomfort I feel in a noisy environment such as at meal-time or the cacophony in praise-time in church.

I enjoy listening to music (my tastes are mostly classical) and playing the piano (though not well). One effect, doubtless caused by the tinnitus, that I have recently noticed is that I am unable, or at least find it difficult, to detect the pitch of a quiet note, particularly if it is in the lower register. For example, when sight reading music I know when I have played a wrong note - unless I am playing it very quietly. And then I am at least aware of the sound but I cannot be sure that it is the right pitch. Probably this is because the volume of the tinnitus is partially obscuring the note. I like to harmonise when singing in church but, again, I can be unsure that I am singing the correct pitch. 

For someone who loves listening to and making music this is kind of scary. Like, where will it end?  Am I to share Beethoven's destiny (though without the musical acumen)?

Apparently this is a known effect as in this site which suggests that "tinnitus acts as something of a pitch magnet, drawing the voice or instrument to inaccurate notes."

Snare drums and tinnitus

Snare drum

As CCM goes our church is relatively innocuous. We don't rely on amplification. Many of the songs we sing are our own. The praise leader generally has an acoustic guitar, we have a grand piano and several excellent pianists, the possibility of bass guitar and trumpet depending on availability of players, a congregation that sings well. And a drum kit (next to the piano).

I experience mild tinnitus and loud sounds can distort. This is partly age related and partly due to angle grinders in my earlier years of stupidity. In retrospect I earnestly tell the youngsters to look after their bodies - we don't generally get replacement ears (or eyes or backs) and they can be so easily permanently damaged.

Looking at this diagram, and adding the blood and gore that doubtless accompanies it, it is frankly amazing that my or anyone else's ear works at all. I am so very thankful that I can hear as well as I can, and for my other senses too.  We are fearfully and wonderfully made.

The cacophony of noise that is our praise is bad enough on my ears but the snare drum beats it all. One internet sufferer writes from bitter experience: The sound of a snare-drum hit is one of the worst types for the ear.  The fast attack comes too quick for the ear to defend itself by closing down a bit, so the ear closes too late. Bad news for the ears. This guy recommends that all drummers wear ear plugs. Not that I am telling anyone to do anything in this post - I am merely relating my own feelings and I do not intend to offend.

The "snare" is a number of springy wires that are stretched across the lower drum "head" and thus jangle against it when the drum is hit. There is a lever that adjusts the tension and thus allows the snare to be disengaged.

It's not that I dislike drums per se. But to my ears the snare drum sounds a bit like a drawer full of metal pots and pans being tipped from about head height onto a concrete floor. On every beat. I don't particularly like this sound, let alone its volume. And whilst on this hobby, I hate the way the snare resonates when I play the piano (outside of meetings) and generally get annoyed enough to warrant getting off the stool and disengaging it. I've toyed with somehow permanently crippling it but I think this would be noticed.

Maybe I should wear ear plugs. But I don't want to make it obvious. Instead I tend to stand as far away from the drum kit as I can.

Hard of hearing

I may have mentioned that I have suffered tinnitus for many years now. This constant background noise sets a lower limit to what external sound levels I can hear. In addition loud noise tends to distort in my ears. So for me the so called cocktail effect works in reverse - the more people speaking at once the less likely I am to be able to make out anything, so that I tend to retire, give up, at corporate mealtimes.

After church today we had a special lunch in honour of a student who has just graduated. I had been cooking vast quantities of chips in the kitchen so when I finally made it into the dining area the meal was already in full progress and there was a lot of talking going on. The noise level hit me rather like the heat can when entering a sauna. It was uncomfortable. So I went upstairs to get some ear plugs. A few minutes after returning those sitting nearby noticed and I was conscious of laughter at my expense. Not nasty - after all we are Christians - but laughter none the less.

Why is is reasonably socially acceptable to be lame, or blind, but having a hearing deficiency or going about without shoes on is not? Could I claim discrimination?