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I believe in God...

It is acceptable to be religious in modern society provided you give credence to multi-faith. But to be a radical, believing (or real) Christian is generally considered to be very whacky. Incidentally I deeply respect those with other beliefs but that does not mean I necessarily agree with them.

Credo in Deum Patrem omnipotentem... All that I have lived for depends on this premise. And yet I find it to be paper thin.

Perhaps the problem is the tendency to interpret the creed as suggesting that I have to work up these "I believes". One meaning of the English word "faith" goes along with this idea: "Strong belief in God or in the doctrines of a religion, based on spiritual apprehension rather than proof."  But the Bible meaning is much more along the lines of being "trustworthy" or "faithful" e.g see here.

So when that "father of us all", that patriarch Abraham heard (or thought he heard) God promise him a son, he tried making it happen in Ishmael, but the true heir Isaac was born a full 25 years after the promise was given with no more effort on Abraham's part than I exerted when I sired my children, and that at 100 years old and his wife barren. And we are told that God reckoned Abraham righteous because he believed. With the benefit of hindsight we know Abraham did not give up on God even when, years later, he was told to offer up Isaac as a living sacrifice. Although at the time perhaps his "faith" was as wobbly as mine is.

This desisting from my own efforts, this "be it unto me according to Thy word" goes against human nature. I want to succeed, I want to be able to do it (whatever it is) "I want to be like Jesus" (a song which sticks in my memory because someone I was fond of at the time sang it, but one of those many songs with rather weak and muddled theology), but in fact I find myself to be a humbug like the Wizard of Oz.


the Wizard of Oz

In Christian circles we are told that it doesn't matter how bad we are provided we come to God for forgiveness - conversely it doesn't matter how good I have been up till now if then I apostatise.  This doesn't make sense in terms of "belief" because it begs the question of degree. But it does make sense if what really matters is - will I remain faithful? - i.e. will I not give up on God never mind what circumstances He throws at me?

I am aware that such a theory might only be a self fulfilling prophecy. One cannot know for sure until the matter is finished and, unfortunately, by then it is generally too late which principle is beautifully if inaccurately portrayed by Flanders and Swann.

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